abrupt change of plans

Dh and I agree that we want to know what the problem is with fertilization and embie development. Our current clinic will not offer any testing on the sperm, other than the basic analysis (which has been done 4 times). All they say is to keep trying IVF. Well, what if DH's swimmers have, for example, a high degree of DNA fragmentation - which is a distinct possibility - and he simply can't be a biological father? IVF would be a huge waste of money. We don't understand why our clinic won't provide these kinds of tests, and so we're outta there. I'm phoning tomorrow to ask for a copy of our record.

We're looking at three clinics in the GTA that do offer more extensive sperm tests: ISIS, Markham, and Hannam. (In addition, they all seem to believe in immunological issues, so if that crops up, too, at least we can deal with it.) We'll probably be wait-listed again, but we're used to that, I guess. If we don't get another cycle in by the end of the summer, we'll have to figure something else out. Either wait until the summer of 2010 to fly back here, or I'd have to take a medical leave (if that would even be allowed under my teaching contract - probably not...).

I'm hoping for Hannam. He's got a great reputation, good success rates, and the clinic would be relatively easy for me to get to by transit. I e-mailed them re: wait time, and can't wait to hear back.

I still want donor as our last resort - e.g., for when I'm approaching 40 and just need something to work already - so I guess I'll keep on hoping and praying for DH to come around on this issue. He's trying to be understanding, but he will never truly 'get' how important this is to me. It's not his fault; it's just the way it is.